The End
by Winds of Water
Summary: Time dulls the pain. But the memories never fade. Somewhat one-sided Roy/Ed


You'll understand the title soon enough.

Anyway, this is the result of a oneshot idea that just would _not_ leave me alone today. So in an effort to clear my mind so I can try and finish writing Shifting, I wrote the oneshot all up. Whether it's good or not, I wrote it. And now I can think clearly again.

This is not fluffy at all.

And yes, the summary reads 'Red'. It makes sense, I'm saving summary room (not that this one needs it). It's what my LJ is, so I thought I'd bring it over here too. I wasn't about to put up 'Archive of RoyxEd'... nuh-uh. My readers already know the pairing I support anyway, so that definitely helps avoid confusion.

So here you all are, the result of a pestering oneshot idea.

* * *

The End

The dusky purple twilight was settling over the quiet park, the last of the rainclouds drifting away lazily on the cool updraft. The sidewalks that cut through the trees and lush grass of the park was dark from being saturated by the rain. The lampposts along it made the sidewalk shine a dull beige in the fading light, and made the grass on either side glitter. The park benches, normally crowded with young couples out for a midnight walk followed by a talk, were empty due to the earlier rain.

Save one.

The resolute figure of Edward Elric sat alone on one such bench. His clothes stuck to him damply, and his normally bright blond hair was darkened with water that had not yet dried and the braid was plastered to his back by all appearances. He shifted, the only sign of life he'd given in the past few minutes. Leaning forward, Edward placed his arms down against his knees, palms upward towards his face as he stared at them.

It had been a month. Time had dulled the pain, as it always did. But there was little he could do to forget, not that he was ever sure he wanted to.

"_I just can't do this anymore." Roy said, still looking out the window. He had his hands clasped behind his back, and was rocking slowly back and forth on his heels. "This you being gone so much, it makes it too much like the flings I used to have before you. Now I feel like I'm exclusively one night standing you."_

"_It's not like I choose to be gone!" Edward flared up, hands clenched at his sides. _

"_I know, Ed, I know." Roy sighed, closing his eyes but did not turn to face his once boyfriend. "But we have to end this. I need someone who can be around more. Someone who I know, without any doubt, loves me. You've never once told me you love me."_

_Edward stared at the man, aghast. "I… see." He said stiffly, and blinked hard as he looked away from Roy. "I love you, Roy. I do. So forget about this breaking up stuff," he said as he began walking over, "and let's go-"_

"_No, Fullmetal." Roy said firmly, and turned to shake his head. "I've made my decision."_

"_Did you ever love me?" Edward whispered, feeling as if he'd been slapped. He hadn't been called Fullmetal by Roy since they'd started dating. Now the name was back, along with the sting of rejection._

"_You're dismissed."_

_Edward opened his mouth, and then closed it. He slowly turned and started walking towards the door, and then fairly fled as emotional pain ripped through him. He felt like screaming, and inside he was. He didn't even try to hide the tears as he fled from the office. _

Edward gave a shaking sigh, and raised one hand to brush away the tears that had welled in his eyes. He shook his head with a sad smile, yes, time had dulled the pain of that day. He had begun to be able to eat again. His fits of screaming had subsided, he no longer snapped at everyone he spoke to. He'd even begun to sleep again. It had taken a few weeks, but he had slowly begun to move on.

He had said the words Roy had wanted him to say. Even though they hadn't felt right being forced from him in that devastating moment of his life. He had wanted to tell Roy he loved him when he felt the time was right. Now he couldn't say those words to Roy, the man didn't want to hear them.

And yet, Edward held onto them. Held on to his love, while Roy continued to drift farther away from him. It was all he could do.

"_Oh, and Fullmetal?"_

_Edward turned back, a fledgling hope rising in his chest. "Yes?"_

"_Do try and get over it, or at least pretend you have."_

But Edward couldn't just 'get over it'. It wasn't that simple… he loved Roy. Yet it seemed that the affection hadn't been truly returned. Roy had wanted him to move on, or to conceal his unwanted love for the man who no longer wanted him. He still had feelings for Roy, he'd never felt as alive as he did when he realized he loved the man. Love was wonderful… and painful all at the same, brutal time.

But it let him know he was still alive.

He gave a hollow sounding laugh, and bowed his head. It was oh so ironic, now that he thought about it. That one conversation, the one they'd had before Roy had agreed to go out on a date with him.

"_A date?" Roy blinked at Edward in shock, finally looking up from the documents he was going over._

"_Yes, a date." Edward smirked. "You said I could choose my reward. I've chosen. I want to go on a date with you. Unless you're just going to run away."_

"_You're the one who'd run away." Roy argued, and considered the blond standing expectantly before his desk. "Fine."_

_Edward's face brightened with a smile. "I won't run away."_

"_You'll see, I'll be right."_

"_Will not, bastard!"_

He'd kept true to his word as well. He hadn't run. In the end, it had been Roy who, in a sense, had run away. So what had happened? If Roy was supposed to be right, and he himself wrong, why was Roy the one who had run?

Edward was still here. He was still watching at a distance. He'd given up on waiting, it was too painful.

Besides, he wasn't sure he had a heart to give away anymore even if someone was waiting for it. He'd offered his out to the Flame alchemist, and it had been sent back in ashes.

Ashes that he'd grown good at hiding, just like Roy had wanted. Even though the love he had for Roy made him feel alive, he hid it nicely. Trying to salvage what was left of himself. And it was fortunate he did, for Roy had stopped making remarks… even if deep down, Edward wanted him to for reasons he didn't understand.

He wanted to be noticed as something more than a pawn again by Roy.

So he smiled at Roy, even though it tore him, and he felt as if his insides were being ripped apart. The smile hid the pain, and the tears. His own mask. He wore the mask, trying to make Roy proud of him, trying to be noticed, even if Roy just cut him down again.

It was stupid, he knew. He also knew that he should know better. But it didn't stop him.

Edward heaved out another sigh through his nose, and at last began to unfold his stiff body from the park bench. His damp clothes chafed at his skin, and the back of his neck itched a bit as his braid was finally jolted from its plastered position. Slowly he began to make his way through the park, finally on his way home.

Each night it got easier. Time dulled the pain. Perhaps tonight would be the one that finally patched his burned heart back together into some semblance of what it had once been? Maybe tonight, everything might be alright.

_Two days passed…_

Edward walked through the streets of Central, weaving his way easily through the afternoon crowd of lunch-goers. He was on his way to the train station. He had turned in his pocket watch yesterday to Hawkeye, deciding that it might be best if he didn't see Roy. Now he was going home to Risembool.

He wasn't sure what he'd do when he got there, only that this might be for the best. If he ever wanted to heal, it might be possible if he didn't see Roy once a week. So in an effort to find himself again, he had resigned from the military, and was on his way home.

It ached to be leaving this all behind, yes. But, if Roy were ever to change his mind… he'd know where to go to find him again. Even though he truly held little hope for a reconciliation.

Suddenly, Edward stopped, frozen in place.

Roy was walking towards him, his arm around the shoulders of a man Edward did not know.

They passed by him, and Edward didn't even turn to watch them continue on by. Roy hadn't even seen him.

"I love you." He whispered sadly, and shook his head to clear his mind. Putting on a smile again, Edward resumed walking.

So… it was really over now.

The flickering lights of hope dimmed, and went dark. Edward knew that Roy had set fire to the bridges again. He doubted Roy would try and build another to his heart. Yet he'd still be there on the opposite bank, waiting.

He'd wanted Roy to be his everything. He had wanted to be everything to Roy. Roy had moved on though. He'd carry on, somehow. He always had… now it was just to a sadder tune.


End file.
